Emotional to the point of rationality
The rain of today
brings winds before of yesterday
and where the sun tomorrow may lie
strikes but a moment
as your touch upon mine
seldom in future and past may lay.
Tomorrow may shine on yesterday’s flurry,
but, embrace me, love!
Drink me, never but today forever,
those temporal torrents diluting
as through you I flow
and in us deliverance sustain.
As each day repeats itself
–
drip,
–
drip,
–
drip.
This is the longest winter of my life.
In darkness she walks the planes of thereafter
as death ‘round lives tender so mutedly preys
today then tomorrow draws her not closer
her presence through time shoring up in life’s bay.
A friend and a jester in shadows enveloped
she stands at my door asking with me to stay
the play of her forces draws me to greet her
for straying in blindness only time may delay.
Through pink and black leaves she outwardly beckons
and hands in cold terror belatedly folds
for both of us know she long here had treaded
leading our cycles unto the beyond.
–
In darkness we walk, praying together
her void with my tears I never did fill
and as I embrace her she weaves in all feeling
priming a heart for life’s waves never still.
Thunders and rains,
beckons and calls
that which from the heaven could pour
and within its meaning conform.
Immersing it all,
as eternity would, set loose
free upon the world to call
and within me storms to form.
The Sun of November
on grey seas reflecting
through solitude waving
and with it I move.
Uncertainty seething
and others sense drowning
the depths of our being
in stillness consumed.
Resistance to yielding
in virtue transforming
through darkness and greeting
an ancestry formed.
The Sun of November
through solitude waving
Fear rooted releasing
and with it I moved.
If you want to judge the extent of violence a certain group faces, in all the different forms everyday violence can take, what you need to do is examine the state of the nervous system of people belonging to this group.
Trauma layers after each clash with violence, no matter how subtle or imperceptible, and each layer grips the tissues, nerves and muscles tighter and tighter. The reaction becomes chronic, creating a sense of panic and danger even if the danger that originated the gripping response is not immediately present.
We often fail to recognise the subtle violence in our environment because we are desensitised and lead to think that what we experience doesn’t classify as violence because it is ‘not serious enough’. Next time you feel your body gripping, see if you can identify the source of this reaction. Don’t judge yourself if you can’t immediately recognise it or confront it; it’s all a practice, and you can only eventually address an issue if you can feel it clearly first.
And if you find yourself gripping by just sitting on the street, as I do, then do accept there is a battle to be fought; and if you don’t and someone tells you that they do, believe them. The response of their nervous system is one triggered by their survival instinct, and this occurs because experience and patterns observed have taught this highly intelligent organism that there is a threat. This isn’t rooted in fiction, because it is being picked up on a level where we are most attuned – the one of an animal body existing in the physical realm. Work needs be dedicated to adjusting our world so the threat the body registers is no longer present and / or appropriate rehabilitation is offered, not in wasting breath on trying to disprove the violent structure’s existence. The latter is impossible, and violent in itself.
Dear reader,
I offer here a humble translation of the closing track of Lena Platonos’ iconic album ‘Galop‘. I do this to honour the feat of storytelling that many of the pieces on the album represent.
Now,
just as a little air lifted,
everyone expected these days to be cool.
At least that’s what they all said.
Even the lady at the street pavilion
made mistakes in her transactions
from the excessive heat.
And on the radio
they prepare the winter
with humour and stability,
seriousness,
galloping through
and choosing different answers.
You close your eyes.
You arrange a date.
You close your eyes
and dream of different cities.
Sparsely populated cities in the night
lacking unnecessary sounds
whose light emanates from within the people,
from the walls of the houses.
A door opens.
Someone lifts their hand
and their greeting traces the shape of a star,
mmmm,
or rather a moon.
You reciprocate.
Slowly many gather,
then even more.
They all reciprocate
and their greeting traces the shape of a moon
and as they approach one another
they are united by that same gallop
of the first rain;
by the colour of the moon in their own touch.
Yes, and further down there is a couple
that have only a moon
that they cut in two,
biting the half
and again the half,
until crumbs are left behind.
Until nothingness remains.
But they share even that nothingness
as it appears that nothing doesn’t exist.
Maybe that’s why the light emanates from them so.
She swims in a vastness which drifts
and within its essence caresses;
in affection of past, foregone, uncovered,
through rhythm and motion and boundless expanse.
So it becomes
(her advance of no mould)
in uncertainty covered and tension released,
as she swims through the vastness
(swallowed by it)
and her fondness softly embraces.
Hello there, whoever you might be,
I am writing these words at a time when the world has arrived at a point of reckoning, where life feels as though it has been disrupted and many hang on the expectation of a return to normality. Worry, uncertainty and grief are some of the emotions that have reached me, mirroring what I believe is the understanding that a return to what we used to call ‘normal’ may never occur.
Before you dismiss this as fatalistic, I want to share the reason I am priming my body and mind to accept this possibility. I think we all knew, on some level, that the hyperactive organism, our society, was stressed, inflamed and at war with itself. The heat, the speed, the flux of events and information were overwhelming us as we consciously sped towards our own annihilation. I dare then ask – was that normal preferable to what we might conceive past our current inflection point?
I must admit I have embraced these times as an invitation for the transformation I and our entire world needed. Far from idealism about a perfect future of peace and prosperity, I find refuge in the understanding that crises will forever invite change. And I believe change was (and still is) a’ comin’. What shall we manifest from it? That truly is down to us, to each individual’s response and willingness to reimagine our future. Make no mistake – the image each one of us holds in our minds is a thread in the tapestry our collective intelligence ends up weaving into what we refer to as our ‘objective, occurring reality.’
Even if it may feel like this period of viral segregation offers nothing but a darkening, I invite you to consider that it is the balance of life which ensures that after a darkening comes the light. Patience is all that separates these two mutually-affirming surfaces, and the light that shall follow is but an aggregate of our individual sparks.
I plead that you take the time to consider what your spark harbours and to accept all that arises with equanimity and a readiness to support those who may struggle more than you. As a collective, we shall survive this threat, which though painful is most likely gruesome on a different scale in the parallel reality where it is not Corona, but a cousin of the Black Death which is eliminating a whole portion of our species. I am not attempting to trivialise our current state, but merely to aid digestion through perspective on the fact things can always be much, much worse. Holding each other in our mind’s eye and acting with strength, vigilance, compassion and a curiosity for the brighter future is fully within our capability. With urgency, I ask you to embrace this capacity and act out the present and future we are currently constructing with all the care and love you are capable of.
I am keenly writing on topics of interconnectivity, slowness, depth, acceptance, purpose and clarity, hoping to offer a structured account of these thoughts one day. In the meantime, I am always here to exchange notes and thoughts if this might help you in any way with the challenges, fears or grief you might be experiencing.
We remain connected, even at a distance, and our ability to embrace the signals of our reality gracefully and with as little opposition as possible is where peace and resilience lie. Dancing and shaping this reality with the boundless powers of our imagination is what shall keep our heads above the water.
Yours,
Sia
Hop past that stone
To skip to the next
(Jump, stress, race)
Seeking forever a new one to face.
Counting the stones
To move to the next
(Hop, skip, face)
Never enough those stones that I chase.
Eyeing ahead
To look past the next
(Count, move, chase)
Blinded as ever to the path that I trace.
Stopping at one
To see my own place,
(Eye, look, trace)
Vision in stillness I start to embrace.
Standing in current
To feel my own space
(Stop, see, embrace)
Restful in knowing there’s no need to press.
Playing in turning
To grow from my base
Learning at last how the now stone to grace.
Notes From Afar 